


Bucky Bucky you're so fine...

by amerasu1013 (amerasu_1013)



Series: Marvel Crack AUs [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: ALL THE KINKS, Alternate Universe - Crack, Alternate Universe - High School, Bucky is a slut, Consensual Kink, Crack, Humor, Inappropriate Humor, Light Bondage, M/M, Multi, Multiple Partners, Other, Out of Character, Sex Toys, Sexual Humor, Size Kink, many more kinks I can't remember right now, seriously, sort-of-not-really incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-02
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-12 16:17:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4486332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amerasu_1013/pseuds/amerasu1013
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The high school AU where Bucky is a kinky little slut who's happily getting fucked by the entire school and still feels... empty (yes, all the puns). Until he meets Steve Rogers...</p><p>a.k.a. the obligatory high school crack AU where high school gets barely mentioned. And everybody is a kinky fucker.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bucky Bucky you're so fine...

**Author's Note:**

> This started out as a pure crack AU and ended up being... way more kinky than expected. I blame [zilldk](http://archiveofourown.org/users/zilldk) \- YOU KNOW WHY.  
> Anyway: all the kinks. Seriously. ALL. THE. KINKS. Also, obviously: this is pure crack.
> 
> And, as usual: not mine, fucking hell, I don't own SHIT.

**Week One**

The new school isn’t so bad as it turns out, since apparently Bucky’s pale complexion and exotic background (he’s from fucking New York, that’s not exotic, that's like 200 miles away, if even that many) or something make people be nice to him. Seriously: he’s barely even been here for more than two hours and already he’s gotten two party invitations and been asked out on a date by three different people. It’s pretty damn nice is what it is and definitely makes him feel welcome.

The parties he’ll go to for sure (free booze is always a good thing), the dates… yeah no. Better check out the merchandise before taking his pick, first he wants to see what else is on offer here. But yeah, this new school is kinda nice.

Clint’s been showing him around, pointing out the different clubs and cliques, who’s who around here, which people to avoid and who can help with homework, stuff like that. Apparently the swimming pool is a place where he doesn’t want to go, since about every two weeks it gets shut down because some STD or another is spreading there. That tall Norwegian fella can apparently hook people up with free shampoo because he is a model for L’Oréal or some shit, there are two science bros who won’t say no to helping with physics or chemistry (or to threesomes) and Bucky seriously has mad respect for Clint right now when he’s getting introduced to his girlfriend.

The football team guys are the usual steroid-filled things of muscular beauty (and their name – Howling Commandos – all the puns, all. the. puns.), which Bucky really doesn’t mind ‘cause, you know, all that angry, sexually frustrated heterosexual power is just begging to be unleashed onto a kinky little slut like Bucky is. Something to ponder, maybe, later, in bed... The cheerleaders are all devoted lesbians (hence the football team’s sexual frustration), no male has ever been invited to their half-naked sleepovers, so nobody is too sure what’s going on there. Anyway, the school is the usual mix of high school groups and sexual tension and Bucky fits right in.

Also he and Clint fool around behind the bleachers while Nat watches and it’s really nice.

This evening Bucky’s Dad asks if he made any friends yet.

Bucky grins. “This one guy, Clint, he’s been real welcoming.” And has absolutely no gag reflex. “He’s in the archery club and he never misses.”

His Dad hums at that, pleased Bucky’s getting on well at his new school, and gets his evening milk. “That’s nice to hear, son. You should join the club and meet him again, see if that’s true.”

Bucky walks into the fridge when he’s thinking about how that’s a really good idea. He’d love to see if Clint can hit a... different kind of bullseye with a different kind of arrow.

He’s talking about Clint’s dick, if that wasn’t obvious already. Also, the bullseye is Bucky’s prostate. Just, you know, to make that absolutely clear.

 

**Week Four**

Bucky and Clint and Nat (and her big black strap-on) have a nice thing going, but Bucky still feels a little… empty. Not right now, of course, since his mouth is busy sucking on Nat’s clit and his ass is stuffed with Clint’s cock. It’s more a general feeling of emptiness, as if there’s something lacking.

He decides to branch out a little, meet some new people. Tony has seriously the best sex toys ever and Bruce is always good for some hard fucking (honestly: all you gotta do is get the guy riled up and he just starts going to town on you; angry sex with Bruce is _fantastic_ ). It’s definitely nice, but not enough.

The football team is a sweet little interlude when, after they’ve won some important game or shit (Bucky gives fuck all about football, what does he know about important games) and the entire team is high on adrenaline and success, he simply walks into the locker room and bends over a bench for them. They don’t hesitate celebrating their victory in Bucky’s ass – not so hetero after all, then, or maybe just really, really happy they won. It’s really nice, how he’s barely able to walk the next day and especially when he gets an invitation to, you know, join the celebration again after their next game. He does (obviously) and they get into this casual routine of Bucky getting fucked through the floor by a hoard of randy football players and loving the hell out of it. And even sometimes doing some howling of his own, which is fitting because of the team’s name. All the puns, remember? Also the coach buys him a fucking heap of flowers since apparently he’s been integral to the team’s motivation and success during this year’s football season.

But then his brother gets mad at him since the coach didn’t let him join the football team, which is apparently Bucky’s fault, because it might make things weird during those victory celebrations. No matter how many times Bucky points out that he’s adopted and Brock’s actually not related to him by blood, so it technically it wouldn’t be incest - people still get squeamish about it. Point is, Brock is mad at him and even letting him tie Bucky up and… punish him doesn’t improve his mood, so yeah. Seems like his thing with the football team is over.

At least Brock stops pouting.

 

**Week Seven**

Turns out Thor is in fact a model for L’Oréal, which is handy since he’s got a serious thing for exhibitionism. Not that Bucky minds, since that thing in Thor’s pants is a fucking gift from the Gods and the dude really knows how to use it. You see: Thor _gets_ Bucky, he understands him, somehow even when Bucky’s choking on his dick he can understand every garbled word. Plus the guy’s hair is seriously amazing.

So Bucky gets around a lot, meets some new and spectacularly horny people, it’s really nice. But it still doesn’t quite feel like it’s enough.

Which is where this story takes a rather obvious twist, because this is when Bucky meets Steve. Not that Bucky knows yet how his life is soon gonna turn from “sort of okay” to “OMG awesome”. That would be boring. But he’s gonna find out.

Point is, one day Bucky and Clint are on their way to math (a.k.a. “let’s see how many people Mr. Fury can make cry today”) and there’s a commotion at the end of the hallway: people shoving each other out of the way, a couple of girls ripping each other’s hair out, guys in fist-fights and screaming and just mayhem in general. If Bucky didn’t know any better he’d think the Beatles are in town. Or, since it’s 2015, maybe One Direction or some other fuckers, who cares. All Bucky cares about is getting to class (Mr. Fury is scary and probably a pirate) and those people are in his way.

“What’s going on there?” he asks, nudging Clint with his elbow.

Clint elbows him back, aiming straight for the bruise he put there last night. So Bucky likes it rough, sue him. “Right, you haven’t met Steve Rogers yet. He’s been in Germany away on an exchange program – so this is like Jesus coming back from the dead for these guys.”

“He’s that popular?”

Clint nods. “Yeah. Wait till you see him, you’ll get why. Seriously, Rogers is fucking unreal, he’s that pretty. There’s a debate whether he’s the lovechild of the Terminator and Michelangelo’s David or if he was created in a fucking lab – see for yourself.”

The crowd parts like the Red Sea and a dude way better looking than Moses (and with less of a beard) is walking towards them.

“See?” Clint asks, nudging that bruise again – Bucky shudders and pants a little. He _really_ likes it rough, okay? “See what I mean, Barnes? Fuckin’ unreal. Everybody loves him. There’s an actual line of people wanting to blow him, I swear to God. There’s even a waiting list and it’s booked months in advance.”

“Huh.” Bucky says and watches Rogers, who looks back at him and sort of walks into a wall. That’s gotta hurt the dude. Who is really very pretty and doesn’t seem to mind the brunette girl with the very red mouth clinging to his ankles, he just keeps on walking and pulls her along with him. All blond and tall and muscular and, yeah, really pretty, but for some reason Bucky isn’t all that impressed. Probably because Rogers seems _too_ perfect, who gives a fuck. And why is the guy still _staring_ at him anyway? Idiot. So Rogers is pretty and all that, but honestly, Bucky doesn’t think that much of him right now.

But for some reason he suddenly feels weirdly patriotic.

 

**Week Eight**

So Bucky doesn’t like Rogers, because that would be too easy. Problem is: Rogers seems to like _him_. Probably, at least, ‘cause somehow he’s always _around_.

On Monday he starts beating up Brock before Bucky can get the gag out and tell him that this whole bondage thing is actually consensual. Bucky was just about to come and really, he’s not very impressed with Rogers right now.

On Tuesday he rescues Bucky from the kitchen’s walk-in freezer because Rogers is an ass and it’s not like Bucky didn’t need to cool down or something because he just bought this new vibrating buttplug and it’s awesome but sorta distracting in school (but not enough to actually take it out, hence the thing with the freezer, Rogers, you fuckhead).

On Wednesday he brings Bucky apple pie (he’s allergic) and flowers (they make him sneeze) and asks him to be Juliet in the next school play (what). Rogers will be Romeo (of course, also, what). Apparently he and Bucky would be very convincing as star-crossed lovers (seriously, what even, what) and he thinks Bucky would look great in a dress (oh my God, _what_ ). Needless to say Bucky says no and also kicks Rogers between the legs. ‘cause he’s not a girl, thank you _very_ much. Fucker.

On Thursday he shows up at Bucky’s house. He slams the door in Rogers’ face and goes back to jerking off.

On Friday Bucky actually thinks Rogers might finally have given up, but then he gets home and finds Rogers in the kitchen, drinking milk with Bucky’s Dad like it’s completely normal. It’s not, it’s weird – Rogers calls him Mr. Pierce and who likes milk anyway and it’s _weird_. Bucky’s Dad seems to like Steve and obviously wants to keep him around so he can use him for his own nefarious purposes (Bucky isn’t exactly sure what his Dad does for a living) or whatever, since he tells Bucky off for not being nice to their guest. Bucky shouts at them both, then goes to the garden to kick at the vegetables.

On Saturday Bucky gets more flowers and chocolate and an awful little poem in which every second word seems to rhyme with ‘line’. Want a taste? “Bucky Bucky you’re so fine, you’re so fine I walk the line”. Yeah. A Shakespeare Rogers is _not_. There’s also a very detailed drawing of Bucky, which – okay, the entire school has probably seen him naked by now, so it’s not weird that those details are… accurate, but still: Bucky is pretty sure that particular sex position is anatomically impossible. It feels like Rogers is courting him, all those gifts. Which is weird. And not at all flattering.

On Sunday Bucky is home alone. His Dad is off at a ship launch ceremony or whatever, Brock is busy boning that guy Wilson, so Bucky wanders around the house and eats cereal in his boxers. He’s quite annoyed when the doorbell rings since he’s currently very busy doing nothing, but opens the door anyway. He should probably not be surprised Steve Rogers is once again standing on his doorstep, what with all that happened this week, but it’s still a little bit of a shock. Why, you ask? Simple:

Steve Rogers is naked.

Bucky stares for a while.

Steve says “Hi?” and raises his hand at Bucky. Another part of his anatomy rises in greeting as well.

Bucky stares some more. “Are you part horse?” he finally asks because hotdamn. That’s a _big_ cock.

Steve says “Umm. Can I come in?”

Well. Since he asked so nicely.

And, as it turns out: Steve Rogers is not only hung like a horse, he fucks like one too. A champion horse that is. Steve Rogers is a _stallion_ , baby, that’s all you need to know.

 

**Week Nine**

Bucky spends the entire week getting fucked in every position ever imagined and a few that he comes up with himself. Everything is wonderful and nothing hurts (unless Bucky asks Steve for it). Some people in school stop being nice to him because Steve is their Second Coming (hee) and Bucky stole him. Whatever, he doesn’t care, who gives a shit when Steve Rogers is plowing his ass on the regular? Not Bucky, that’s who.

His life is _awesome_. Like you’ve been promised.

 

PS: Bucky totally plays Juliet in that school play. And he totally wears the dress. And, indeed, he _does_ look great. Steve agrees, obviously, as do the others: they get standing ovations.

And they fucked happily ever after.

 

THE END


End file.
